Working Ourselves to (near) Death

Give me more than just meager work. Pile my table if you will. Stack up papers and your questions give me more than I can bare. I guess I need the adrenaline rush or I guess it just makes the Lord happy because he sees me doing the Kingdom work all with my strength. Well I have to prove that I’m no lazy worker. And so I ask for more, a student with study responsibilities and juggling ministerial work as well. The key to this is time management, well that would always mean no time for rest. But it is all for the kingdom I say.

And if I see lazy people unmoved, those who like contemplative ways of pausing or taking their leisure time to read and meditate I simply see them as fools. Time is moving and so there is practically no time for other things than just responsibilities and work. For time waits for no man. Our responsibility is to press on until it hurts.

Reading is done with speed and meditation becomes more like a task of trying to answer questions as fast as possible after hearing the question read. In a hands-on-the-buzzer kind of way. Everything is done in speed and haste, no slowing down if you will. Everything should be like that I say, because time is running out. So we more fast fast fast.

And after all is said and done, beating my body to shreds and not enjoying life, moving through it in speedy haste ignoring beauty, I forget what it means to be called a child of God and of innocence that was once a part of me. Now the language i hear to mold my thoughts are being champions, a success, seizing the moment well all of these entail a great deal of anticipation as well as what I would call a false sense of expectation. To get lost in all this thing we call worth actually sucks out the life in us.

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