In life we all have problems. Or let me just retract, we will encounter problems. That is something that we cannot avoid.
I know from my own experience that when things look like they are going well, something creeps up and makes us wallow in pain and crying out “what happened?”
All of us have clear cut plans set out in maybe some piece of paper but sometimes we will eventually have to come to terms with editing it all over again. Sometimes we just have to throw them in the junk bin. Life is like that and it doesn’t feel fair on most occasions.
Trying to remain positive is something we have to work on. We are after all people, works in progress.
One thing we do have to learn to cope with is that, problems we deal with, are not just isolated cases. We will tend to think sometimes when wallowing in the pool of self pity that our problems are stuff that nobody else goes through. We paint a picture that the world is out there to give us all the blame, to punish us even.
I write this not as someone who has graduated from this state of thinking. I’m writing this as someone who constantly feels this way. I feel sometimes that life is somehow trying to settle a score on me. Punish me.
But it doesn’t help thinking that our problems are greater that someone else’s. To go into that direction means that we will never get out of that hole or prison we keep digging or locking ourselves in.
It is then a good practice to know that everybody goes through periods of pain and struggle with them. It’s good to acknowledge this. Regardless of the degree of pain we go through, we do not struggle alone, because everyone suffers and go through painful moments.
Take time to regain back confidence. Usually, we will tend to get depressed going through struggles. But we have to work on confidence. Try out something instead. I deal with pain by writing. Sometimes it doesn’t help but it keeps me occupied. I have my share of compliments on stuff I write, not many but they cheer me up. They regain some form of confidence and help me progress.
Talk and listen to someone. Sometimes a good conversation can repel the constant wallowing in self pity. Too much isolation will only fuel the pain. So like my brother telling me to socialize more, it’s a good advice really. I tend to be antisocial, but I try to meet people and talk and listen. It helps me divert all the energy on myself.
I read the status of a friend of mine quoting Charlie Chaplin saying, “Nothing is permanent in this wicked world. Not even our troubles.” That’s good to note.