The opposite of “Marrying the person of your dreams.” The fact of the matter is, we never marry the person of our dreams. We marry the person of our reality.
Dreams are like ideals. Our vision of what our partner is supposed to be. Some of us make a list. Some of us paint them with feeling. Some of us equate them with celebrities or famous people. This partner of ours is the cream of the crop in the realm of our imagination. The man of my dreams. The woman of my dreams.
As we stroll through life in the real world and when we meet people and we have these pangs when we meet some people who somewhat fit the “of our dreams” label. We get exited. We lose sleep. We skip meals. Our hearts pound. We fumble with our words whenever we talk to this “of our dreams.” We smile, we laugh, we giggle. Ahh so happy.
We get elated when our feelings nod in agreement with theirs. So then that makes for permitted hand holding and other stuff as well. You know. So I don’t have to elaborate.
As times passes our then “of our dreams” slowly diminishes. Some survive by making amendments to their ideals and are able to chart the way forward. Some on the other hand, crash. The either add or strip their ideals. What’s important is that there is a major overhaul. And we come to the conclusion that we were wrong. So we set out to create another dream. The thing is all along in that re-write, reality is telling us something important. The person we journey out from the altar and make life with might not come close to our dreams. The fact is not to revert back to the dream whenever a disagreement occurs, whenever conflict arises or whenever the spark (which is our responsibility to continually light) dims out.
Lay the dream to rest once reality shows you the person.