Interstellar (not a review)

After reading (light reading really) through some reviews (not that many) and googling about the movie “Interstellar,” I finally went to watch it. I’m a big fan of the Nolan brothers (because of the Batman trilogy and Inception), so I didn’t really think much about whether to watch the movie or not. The important thing was “when.”

That “when” was Monday and it was my off day anyway.

I’m not gonna offer a review of any kind because I guess there is too many things to consider and think of. Plus I’m not a scientist and won’t do any justice speaking about the facts or the non facts of the movie.

But what the movie did for me (which a lot of movies have done as well) was, it made me think and reflect. Nothing new about this since i’m an introvert, it’s like second nature already. Anyway getting back on track…

Although I didn’t have the mind to digest the science, logic and theories embedded in the movie, I still appreciated it. My friend who was with me (who watched the movie 3 times already) was asking me, “Did you understand the movie?” I answered, “I didn’t understand it but I get it.”

Yes, I know I’m being vague in answering his question. But then that was how it felt for me. I didn’t have to understand everything to appreciate the movie. The parts that were way above my head, I just left them as just stuff I don’t understand. The stuff I thought were, “Come on! Where’s the logic in that!” I simply told myself that it was just a movie and the logic of things were in the head and mind of the creator. And the stuff I could understand, well, I resonated with. Again, a mixed bag but I enjoyed the movie. I’d probably watch it again if someone paid my ticket but I really did enjoy it. As a whole it really was a good movie.

This was the main reflection though, logic as we know informs and makes us understand. If the movie was based on logic alone we’re be bored stiff with it. Now add mystery in the mix, then you’re going somewhere. Logic informs and gives understanding, mystery draws us in and make us have seconds or probably more than that.

My cracked iPad screen

Gee, it’s hard not to feel frustration fuming. Even when I consider myself a person who takes good care of things especially the ones bought with the produce of my sweat. I think that term seems irrelevant in our modern day and age but you get my drift.

(Back then to the thing I was talking about) It broke.

Just a line but an unmistakable one, that I try to brush off with laughter, with tilting, with consolation, and to some points thinking it was just one of those nightmares I would eventually wake up from.

Too bad.

It’s still there.

And yes, it’s not the end of the world, and yes I’ll eventually choke up enough money to replace the cracked screen. Mishaps like these, one could almost definitely find a solution.

You only lose money or probably some viable documents. Or pictures and apps (but if you’ve synced them in the cloud then they’d be still there). See. Nothing to it. Though I’m still in technological mourning.

But it’s different with the breath of life. When you meddle with life on a knife’s edge, I’m sorry but there’s no solution in trying to feel the physical warmth of love again.

to be real

This piece (I want to call it some sort of poem but it does not fit the category) is somewhat inspired by “The Words.

his anger was somewhere else
though it seemed to project itself in his lashings at objects
whatever it was that was within his reach

but what he wanted to reach was not in the present interior
it was somewhere

the past

in which he could not tweak
he could not change
he could not touch
nor feel with his hands

and all he wanted
all he longed for
was not to run
but for him to be real
“i’m sorry.”

wondering perfection

It has been awhile but I penned this last Friday. With a few adjustments of course.


the beauty of perfection, if there ever was and is such a thing,
feels like death,

but looks and is shaped like, pure gold,

the inner will lead, the process of tilling,
of refining,
the outer,
into wonder.

prosperity or the cross?

we must have different ways of interpretation
or it’s just me not wearing my glasses
since i don’t have 20/20 vision…
did god promise us
or simply
denial or self and

Matthew 16
24 Then Jesus said to his disciples, “Whoever wants to be my disciple must deny themselves and take up their cross and follow me. 25 For whoever wants to save their life[a] will lose it, but whoever loses their life for me will find it. 26 What good will it be for someone to gain the whole world, yet forfeit their soul? Or what can anyone give in exchange for their soul?

moonlight dreams

I wrote this as a song. You can listen to it by going here.

moonlight dreams
under night sky seems
to be all i see
as i drown in steams

would you be a dear
help me gather tears
that have stayed with me
all these years

and i cant take
if they fall again today
like rain drops
filling empty wells
and memories
often disappear

chasing after dreams
that takes away
all of my energy

black rose

Black Rose
Black Rose Tattoo (image taken from Black and White Rose Tattoos)

words that give the mind to speak,
beauty of an unsettling,
though death is what one perceives,
living inside this vessel,
a hopeful becoming.

Here are some meanings behind the image of a rose and what some of the color signifies. I’m contemplating of getting one (not this particular design thought) as my next tattoo together with the words above. Just a thought.

mind square

“my mind is a square”
but probably some would argue
that the “brain has not a shape”
and i would tell them
“i’m sorry i’m not sure you understand”
and they would look like the expression of one saying “eh?!!”
as if i said some four letter word
or the one with an “F”
go figure
and then i would retract
“in the art of making myself clear”

i would begin to explain
by what i meant by me saying
“my mind is a square”
but in the midst of explaining
as if by some invisible force
like someone had put
headphones playing music in their ears full blast
i can’t understand it
cause they cant hear (hence headphones)
even when
making myself understandable
they would nod like they disagreed
and “a huh-ed” like they didn’t mean it
like in a scene where i imagined
if i was a comedian
they would laugh
because they just had to
cause a comedian is supposed to make people laugh
and the audience is supposed to laugh at the jokes
this is what i would call
an S2S
and they were doing gestures on faces
that represented S2S

i’m sorry…
i need to explain what the two S’s and the number 2
the first S= supposed
the 2=to
and the last S= situation

and so after my explanations
they would begin to tell me
“now the human body…”
and yada this yada that
and ramble on talking about the human body
and human organs
and how all these things
can’t be ascribed
to any 2 dimensional shape
like the very one i mentioned
and the person repeats what i said
or so as he/she heard
which goes something like this
“like when you said your brain is a square…
that can’t possibly be.”

i get frustrated
cause we were communicating on different frequencies
like me speaking to donkeys
well at least now scientists (i heard) are teaching monkeys
sign language
but despite the progress
even if the person was a monkey knowing sign language
it still wouldn’t help cause
i don’t sign language
and i never learned how
maybe i should
but i have no money right now

and the person made me look dumb
i mean i did go to school and learned up
about the human anatomy
though right now
my mind is a little fuzzy
not remembering half or less about the stuff i learned at school
cause though i sat in front
a few spaces to the teacher’s desk
i was mostly day dreaming
and not paying attention
to the teacher’s words
but that did not make me a fool
retracking back to the stuff i said that earlier that
“my mind is a square”

well i have to say that
in a way to tell you this narrative
of part fiction,
part memoir,
part conceptual (i love this word),
and part giving out a message
it just means that:

sometimes when we try to convey a message,people read what they think they hear and when we try to explain…they act as if they already know whatever it is you’re gonna say and it’s already wrong from the beginning so they hear you speaking but they are not listening like what they were doing in the beginning of not hearing and yes I’m just imagining how stuff like this happens all the time.